Swimming in Vaseline

So its Saturday and I woke up at 12:30 pm because I slept at 5 am this morning. Woke up, all groggy and speaking in my low, manly (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/manly) voice, when Hiram introduces me to the book I kissed Dating Goodbye.

So far, I'm on page 46 and I have to say, this book really opened my eyes. After spending the last few nights reading the bible and what not, this book seems like the most fitting into my life right now. For the most part, the descriptions of why people get into relationships and my past relationshipssssss... are fully reviewed and understood in those first 46 pages. All the points the book makes, all the relationship ideals that I've grown to understand, learn, and accept, all of them, Kut.

I can't say I didn't learn anything from all those past events, but I can say that they were all done for the wrong reasons. I have quite a few people to thank for their prayers, and their understanding despite my arrogance and blind sight. In hind sight, it was me who was the most immature and the most childish, the most stubborn and stupid, the nincompoop (http://dictionary.reference.com/search?r=2&q=nincompoop).

But God forgives all. No matter how big the sin. Right? So ya... long walk ahead. One day I will see the world eye to eye. But right now, I don't think I deserve that.


In God we trust? Starting to again :)

Simon

Learning to walk

So just this past Saturday was orgo chem midterm. I hoped I would do good, and I studied as much as I could for it but >_< @$%&#. But there is always next time, a next orgo chem, and more midterms.

I also went to my first prayer meeting today. It was amazing to be able to pray with everyone. Everyone prayed for wisdom and guidance in midterms, setting up women/men cell and coffee house. But... but... ... ..but I prayed for my parents. I pray that my parents will be more supportive. I guess sometimes, you never know when God will show you his love or his methods. Just like back from gr 6 - 8 when nobody lent a helping hand and I had to come out of it myself, and do all those things just to learn. Well I thank Him that he is here now and is showing me a better way. I just wish I knew what to do sometimes when faced with dilemna.

Baby steps. . . . . . . baby steps.

This is my first blog ever. In all 6935 days of my life, I've never written a blog, but the reason why? Simply put, it's gay. At least, I considered it to be of homosexual nature back then... Now a days, I do not consider it so "gay" ... maybe a little gay ish.. but on a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being Absolute Homo, ... well I'm writing one now. But why? Why can it be considered womanly for a man, (yes I am a man) to write a blog? It was prolly my upbringing. I only started reading blogs September 2006, and this is due to my unisex school upbringing. What kind of male, in an all male school would write a blog and then post about it on his MSN? That's just wrong, and on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being the MOST wrongest, blogging is a 79 on the gaydar. But I am sorry. Enough with the homophobic remarks. I don't know what most bloggers write on their first blog ever. Is there some sort of inauguration blog? Some ritualisitic blog that the blogger must blog in order to join the blogging society?

Observing what I have read from Hiram's, Abe's, Jeff's, and others' (other's is read as
others-is) blog, they tend to write about things they don't want to say in real life to real people, and is mostly an afterthought, a retrospective view of their day/week or past events. I have found that blogs often include quotes, emotes, and notes, about life, strife, and stuff. Some blogs even inlcude info about what that person bought when they went shopping. I mean, who cares what you buy day to day, week to week, and month to month? But I do care... >_> And the people care about you, care. So, keep writing about that stuff :) it's nice to read. But in all seriousness, reading blogs is fun, and please don't take anything I write personally. THESE BLOGS ARE NOT DIRECTED AT ANYONE IN PARTICULAR! Though they may directed to particular groups of people ^_^. In Anycase, I shall begin.

So today is October 15, 4:48 pm. Tonight, we will have Da been low in our house with all the froshies from LCAC + Steph and Victor. The house currently smells like melted plastic because Hiram left the soup ladle handle on the stove, causing the ladle to melt, and thus, smell! Also, my legs really hurt a lot. About 2 weeks ago, Hiram and I started working out, and it's awesome cause I feel like I have so much more energy in me, especially to "Understand" and "accept" people.

Some people ask me why am I not so mean anymore, or not so mean to particular people? Sorry victoria :( U took the brunt of it. I think it's due to the fact that everyone in ACF is so full of life and energy. Last year I never went to ACF, because it was conflicting with my gaming schedule. But, I hope that I matured a little, and that's why I dont game anymore, and now that I go to ACF, I feel....1355 3m0.

I think the ACF retreat, and meeting with so many people and being able to share what troubled me for so many years... really helped me open up. I'd like to thank you (u know who you are) for sharing and opening up to "Abe's roomate." Growing up in a guys school, you never really get talk to anyone about your feelings. But it's easier with girls :) and thank God for that. Particularly, thanks Karen for talking wif me for 3 hours yesterday, you got me to think clearly, just like you always do (*big "awwwww" hug*).

"-_- burnt plastic really smells bad

I also started going to church? Wat da hek is going on here? I used to go to a catholic cathedral, with its overbearing beams and DOMINATING!!! priests >_<. After gr 8, I swore I'd never talk to God or go to any other "house" of his because it was crap. If he really cared and loved everyone, why would he make me go through suicidal depression twice for 4 years? Meet some amazing girl a few years later, only to have it last for 5 days with another long episode of depression? And what the hell was up with my family? Like what kind of kid has to sit his parents down like children and talk to them to "stop it" "or else!" and twice too -_- But I guess now that I'm coming from a different perspective, I guess I have to thank God for all those life experiences. If it wasn't for all those, I don't think I'd be able to joke around as much as I do, and it just wouldn't be me. Also, I have to thank God for introducing Abe (and then Karen) to me, who both opened my eyes to ACF, God himself, and retreat, and everyone else. OMG HAPPY LIFE (>^^)> <(^^)> <(^^<)

But really, thank you. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the Most appreciative chinese infant who draws a picture of a heart for his young mother, you guys get an 11 (God gets 12, cause he's godlike.) *cough cough*

Also, I love my roomates. Everyone is awesome, on a scale of 1 to 10... anyways everyone has their own "thang" you know? Hiram's is MSN + Azn Effectiles, Abe's is anime + karen, Jeff's is Anime, Andrew's is Ebay. Pretty neat how we all get along.

Anyways, my parents came today to bring me a vacuum cleaner, which was really needed since we haven't vacuumed since... well since August when I soloed it. They also brought me food, and monies, and hugs (mommy ^_^) and my tri annual GST tax return of $58!! I feel rich!

Wow, its 5:19 pm, I have been blogging for4:48 - 5:19 mins? 4:48 - 5:19 = umm.. Rachel, help.
Anyways, time for some Orgo chem studyage. Guess tonight will be another long night with LCAC da been low and studying. 5 am sleep? I THINK NOT! 4:30 am :)

God bless (for seriously)
Simon